Why fear was responsible for Jenny having nothing to wear


So Jenny put on a loose fitting outfit that made her feel dumpy but at least she was out the door and on her way to work.

She sat at her desk wondering why she kept doing the same thing over and over.

She resisted the urge to just feel sorry for herself and called her friend Jill to talk through the situation.  I worked with Jill 2 years ago and Jenny saw her transformation.

Often Jenny thought of getting the support she needed to break through and get results but, didn’t want to spend the money and believed she should be able to do it on her own anyway.

Those were two stories she was telling herself that kept her stuck, not living in the present and putting off living the life she was really capable of, dreamed of, and meant to live.

But after the morning’s disheartening stand off with her closet, Jenny realized she had been putting off taking important actions and making changes for months and even years. 

When I met Jenny, I felt her pain and frustration. I’ve been there,  more times than I care to recall!

Here’s what I learned from those experiences:

Under all those justifications and stories I told myself…

I was just afraid.

I mean really afraid. 

It was much more comfortable for me to do nothing and really believe I would get there eventually, just not today.

Except I wasn’t fully happy.

Jenny and I talked about what she had been struggling to achieve, the reality of her present situation and, most importantly, why she THOUGHT she was not succeeding.

The negative self-talk she was replaying over and over each day was the root of her problem!

We uncovered the beliefs and patterns that were getting in her way of her body and wellness success.

Guess what…

The very same way of thinking that was sabotaging her weight loss was also the culprit in why she didn’t have the relationship or the job and money she really wanted. 

We walked together through the fear that was showing up as procrastination, overwhelm and lack of willpower in her life.

Like most of us, Jenny didn’t even know how afraid she really was!

Fast-forward a few months, Jenny lost the 15 lbs. she was fighting for years and created a new relationship with her body and food.  She also finally asked for that promotion and raise and is happily dating a great guy.

 Yes, those are great achievements and they feel good but what Jenny really gained was courage, pride and a trust in herself. 

She realized she could trust herself to push through fear, handle difficult situations and still be OK.

 What Jenny really gained was confidence! 

I often say confidence is a verb.  It doesn’t come one day because you’ve lost a few pounds or accomplished a goal.

True, lasting confidence comes from showing up everyday for yourself and living up to your own ideals.  It comes from feeling afraid and having the courage to go for it anyway.

This is important…

It’s OK to be afraid, everyone is afraid. 

The fear is not going to go away until you take action.

 Your dreams have to be bigger than your fears and you have to be willing to do the work. 

And feeling fear isn’t a bad thing; it just means you are growing.

I invite you to step into the life you say you want.  Learn to say yes to yourself, create confidence and finally break through and take consistent action.